First Piece of Fan Fiction

[ladyofavalon77]

After seeing Day Five of 24 and listening to interviews from Gregory Itzin, I felt really bad that his character was so misunderstood and that no one would give him the benefit of the doubt.  Therefore, playing off his attempts to show that Charles Logan wasn't really an evil person and he DID believe that he had the country's best interests at heart, I came up with a story idea that would justify his horrible behavior that day toward his wife but redeem him at the same time because deep down he really did love her.  Below is the first piece of fan fiction I penned about Charles' thoughts about what happened on that one terrible, fateful day.

 SACRIFICE OF THE HEART

It was finally over...24 hours ago he was a free man and the leader of the free world and now he was just a prisoner behind bars, albeit the accommodations were spacious by any prison's standards but he was still a captive. Because of his former presidential status, Charles Logan found himself under lock and key at an undisclosed compound in the middle of nowhere. At least his room had a nice view outside, even if it was behind iron bars. A few hours ago he could not find the time to write a speech for David Palmer's Memorial Service and now he had all the time in the world as he awaited word of when his trial would begin. Funny how things can change in the blink of an eye.

However, the upcoming legal proceedings were not foremost on his mind. He had accepted his fate the moment the US marshals had come to arrest him for high treason and murder. No, his mind was on something much more dear to his heart. Something that could never be undone, something that was still painful each time he thought of it. Turning away from the window, he closed his eyes and touched the gold wedding band on his right index finger. It was all that was left of his broken marriage and he was both comforted and tortured by its presence.

Such a simple symbol of eternal love and devotion. It was meant to represent the circle of trust and love between a married couple that could not be broken by even the strongest forces. How that had all changed today. He knew she would never forgive him for what he had done but he also wished that he could make her understand that her well being was all he cared about. When he had made this Faustian bargain for the good of the country, he had told himself that she was too fragile from her recent breakdown to be consulted. He lied to himself that he could keep it from her and she would never have to know what happened. He should have known better.

But when his contact informed him that his wife needed to be “handled”, Logan suddenly realized that his careful planning had been for nothing and he might actually lose her. It had taken the attack on the motorcade to realize how much he loved her despite the recent problems in their relationship. Gold refined in the fire comes out stronger and more beautiful than when it first went in and so that was how he viewed their marriage. He could not lose her. Not when he had come so close to losing her the first time.

So he had fought for her, telling his contact he would handle it. There would be no more problems. Logan knew it was too late to take her into his confidence and ask her forgiveness. Her immediate response would be honest and true: Turn himself in and face the consequences. However, what her naïve sense of honor did not comprehend was that it was too late for such heroics. He was in way too deep and the immediate result of his confession would be a quick death for them both. His own death he was ready to face but hers…that was something he could not allow to happen.

Therefore, he had made the most difficult decision of his life…he decided to become the enemy she feared. Logan knew his wife better than anyone and he knew that once she set her mind to something, even in her current unstable condition, she would not stop until she accomplished what she set out to do. In order to ensure her safety, he would need to command her silence. And so he did…with physical intimidation, verbal threats, and anything else he could think of so the men he worked with could see she was not a threat and not take action to “contain” the situation.

Every confrontation was excruciatingly painful as he acted a part he was loathed to play and had to watch the woman he loved slowly but surely turn against him. If there was such a thing as hell on earth, he was in the depths of it as he watched everything he had treasured over the length of their marriage go up in smoke before his eyes. Being only human, his careful façade would crack at times and he would beg for her to understand him, hoping that maybe, just maybe she would see through all the lies and glimpse the truth behind his actions. But he had done his job too well and she believed everything he told her…just as she always had since the day they were married.

Of everything he had done that day, Logan most regretted their last morning together. He should not have allowed her to seduce him at the Presidential Retreat. Even before the words of forgiveness and redemption reached his ears, he knew it was all lies. Martha possessed a very strong sense of right and wrong so she would never overlook what he had done after only a few hours of reflection. But he had given into her for the chance to spend one last night together. To hold her close and maybe convey his love for her one last time before the chasm between them became too wide for him to cross. But he knew it was hopeless when they finished and he tried to help her get dressed. She flinched at his very touch and when she declined to board the helicopter, he was certain it was all a sham. Still he smiled and kissed her goodbye, hoping maybe he was wrong.

So when she revealed her true colors at the airfield, he was not so much surprised at the revelation but at how much it hurt to be betrayed by someone he loved. Didn’t she know he was trying to protect her? Didn’t she knew he didn’t want to lose her? But of course not…because he had never told her. And he couldn’t tell her because it would mean her death.

So he mentally steeled himself against her screams and accusations to finish playing the part he knew she would hate. It was the only way to guarantee her silence…but as the brutal confrontation came to an end he knew he had gone too far. He could see in her eyes, those wonderful trusting eyes that had once gazed at him with such adoration and love now stared back at him with such unconcealed pain and hatred. And he was the cause of it all. What was this monster he had become? When did he cross the line and become that which he hated most?

As he sank down into a nearby armchair, Charles Logan slowly lowered his head into his hands and tried to take comfort in the fact that she was alive and that was all that mattered. He would never forgive himself for putting her through this ordeal and he knew it was too late to ask her forgiveness when she had every right to hate him. But even in this darkest of times, he allowed himself to hold on to the smallest of hopes…that one day…far in the future…he could make her understand that he was not trying to save himself that day…he was trying to save her.

No matter what happens...always know that I love you...

Comments

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You posted it on LJ - YAY!
How much do I love her expression in that screencap!