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[ladyofavalon77]

Third time changing this entry :)  

This WAS a drama filled post about why this journal became friends only but after talking to person in question I realized that I might have jumped the gun so changed it just in case I did.  I will stick to my plan to keep journal friends only just in case my open journal entries were adding fuel to a fire.  And that's all I'll say on the matter :)

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

You know, I wasn't going to comment on this since I don't actually have a journal of my own, so I don't get the whole "friends-cut" concept (I'm guessing it makes your journal private?) but to be honest, you have said things in the past that are pretty offensive, even if you don't realize it. There was an entry about Dancing with the Stars where you glibly mentioned that someone might "convert you to overweight girls" I read awhile ago (while looking for the latest 24 dish). Do you have any idea how rude and ignorant that made you sound? I frankly was offended, and I'm not even your friend! That and the gay-bashing made me pretty uncomfortable reading your journal, which is why I stopped commenting for awhile. But I digress.

These "friends" on LJ: are they really your friends, anyway? Or is "friend" just a subjective term that LJ uses to title the people who read your journal and whose journal you read? Because if it's the latter, then maybe you're putting too much faith in the people who have friended you. I don't think adding someone to your list makes them your friend instantly, and deleting someone probably doesn't mean they hate you! People drift apart online just like they drift apart offline too -- maybe you just don't have a lot on common, or talk anymore, etc?

Anyway, I've (for the most part) enjoyed reading your journal. You made me laugh, so keep that up.

I'm glad you commented!!!

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

See now you spread light on why I've lost some friends :) I wouldn't have known otherwise. I realize the gay entry might not suit people's tastes but I didn't go into detail. I didn't realize the comment I made about Dancing With The Stars was thoughtless and I admit right off...sometimes my mouth does run away with me. I will try to be more careful in the future. My problem has always been discretion. It's easier to change if someone tells me though...the problem I've been having is that no one TELLS ME!!

Now that you've mentioned that those entries made you uncomfortable I do apologize. I should have kept those comments to myself, I just had no idea people were really reading. Some also just came from me talking without thinking. Please accept my apology for the offense...it wasn't meant to do so :)

As for the friends title thing, it could be that BUT there have been a number of run ins with the ones who've left. The person in question doesn't like to confront and when called out on the rug, just denies but does things to go against what they just said. Now if the above mentioned remarks is why they defriended me, I TOTALLY understand. Those thoughts were careless and could be hurtful. However, it would be nice if they would just say so. ESPECIALLY when we've been chatting back and forth for a year or two now.

I'm glad I made you laugh and thank you for being so open minded. My only regret is that I was too open with my thoughts. Thanks for being open with yours!

[opalescence.livejournal.com]

(((((hugs))))) I can't imagine why anyone would defriend you. You're so sweet and thoughtful. I'm here for the long haul, even if you are a Democrat. :-P

awww thanks!!

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

I love reading your journal. It's like a nice warm mug of hot chocolate on a cold winter day. You also make me laugh :)

I'm registered Republican but somehow have fallen in love with Obama. Right now he's the most charismatic! But I am going to a Ronald Reagan dinner on Sat where Elizabeth Dole will be the guest speaker. SEE! I DO have Republican roots!

[agent00.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry about that. Why don't you make your journal friends only?

It is now ^_^

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

I think this will work out so much better :) The comment of the first poster was VERY helpful. I didn't realize I was so careless with my thoughts :) I'm going to try to be more careful :) Thanks for replying *hugs*

Re: It is now ^_^

[agent00.livejournal.com]

No problem! Ohhh and just for you know, I never felt offended by your posts. ever! :) *hugs back*

Re: It is now ^_^

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

Thank you thank you :) I DID try to be thoughtful :) So it's nice to know someone understood me :) *big big hugs*

[xandra73.livejournal.com]

*hugs* You know, this is your LJ, so you should not have to worry about what others think. If they don't like it, they should leave.

But I think a Friends Only LJ, is a good idea, I have done it myself. Anonymous comments are quite creepy in my opinion, especially when it comes to posts that are not fandom.

I always love to read your entries and I never felt offended. :)

Don't worry about it, if people defriend you. Most of the times, it has nothing to do with you personally. Just an example. Maybe they have friended you, because of a certain topic. Maybe you don't talk that much about it anymore and so there is no reason for them to stay. Or their friendlists are too long and they sort out those people who are not much active lately. You haven't posted that much over the last few months, so you could fall into that category.

Friends come and go, that's life. Especially on LJ, were the term friends is a much looser concept than in the real world.

[agent00.livejournal.com]

You know, this is your LJ, so you should not have to worry about what others think. If they don't like it, they should leave.

that is EXACTLY what I was going to say.

*hugs you both*

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

You guys really made my day. Thank you so much :D

You're very wise!

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

I talked to one of the persons in question and that's what they said. This being my first LJ I took the friends list kind of seriously. It ended up being a misunderstanding on both our ends so we left the issue amicably.

I still have a lot of growing up to do and this was a good lesson to be learned. I need to not take things so seriously. Good points about not posting much and different fandoms and I'm glad you liked my entries :) Your words were just what I needed to feel better :) *hugs*

[blessing.livejournal.com]

Hi! I think this is the one you meant. Not too sure! ;P It was the only I saw mentioning "friends only". I went ahead and added you!

[ladyofavalon77.livejournal.com]

That's it :) I friended you back :)